March 27
Can you feel it? The pulse quickening, rumours of the Spring offensive across the scorched bloody earth, Venus approaches the rejuvenated moon, Bozza harrumphs his own way down into the big deep hole he’s dug for himself, the bloody twister, the sap is rising, change seems possible, hope no longer a cruel mockery, maybe you WILL go to Barcelona and purchase the sneakers of your dreams.. armour yourself against any possible disappointment at JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH where the lurking frost upon the bitter hillsides, the gall deep within the bud, and the worm within the apple will be as nothing before the all-conquering might of man like Luke “The Last Dragon” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “Shogun Of Harlem” Thomas (drms) as the ride The Glow to turn out a limitless rushing torrent of hot licks and cool grooves, while I do something or other on the ol’ doghouse and an array of esteemed special guests come of of the star-filled night to share the promise of the turning season and get into it and do their thing, digging it, like an all-ages-appropriate machine or some kind of wonderful that no over-hyped concantenation of California algorithms will ever be able to match, you dig… let the tech bros return to their tediously narrow range of already-stale Midjourney fantasies, let ChatGPT-4 take over the job of creating content that no-one wants to write because no-one wants to read it, let AI wrest the entire world of shit library music out of our nerveless hands and assume the burden of soundtracking the world’s management training videos until the whole planetary system collapses into the sun .. out here beyond the perimeter we’ll stay stoned immaculate, so why not shake a leg and come and join us? It’ll be a thing…
March 20
As the bitter freezing rain lashes down, as Blood And Honey jets in to meet Vlad the Impaler, as the flerfs and Right Said Fred and Russell f*kin Brand creep like a stain over the infosphere, as the missiles rain down and Bozza and Tony B raise their bloodstained hands and grin “who, me?” .. does the doubt creep in? What if everything is fucked after all? Let JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEES MOUTH be the train that rides into your station, a closed carriage of light and warmth that you can jump aboard, then sit back in the padded brocaded seat and take a deep breath as those indefatigable operatives in the service of cool grooves and hot licks Luke “Dark City” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “Nebuchadnezzar” Thomas (drms) fill the air around you with a web of sound for you to lose yourself in, with who knows what special guests coming in thru the perilous doorway out of the echoing street to do their thing while you sit back and relax as the train runs on down the track thru the bitter darkness outside.. inside we’ll have music and light, the immeasurable multi-dimensional beings of the Bee’s team standing by ready with the finest liquors known the humanity, all the creatures of the night passing by the steaming windows, the air full of vibrations, the promise of immanent discovery trembling in the scented shadows, other worlds, other lives…. as Chat GPT edges us closer to the most boring Singularity imaginable where the world drowns in self-replicating marketing spam, as the Encroachment gets ever closer, as the meek are laid low and the proud and unrighteous left to glory in their pride, the seabirds drop dead into the sea, as the dust blows forward and the dust blows back, what’s left to hang onto? What we always had, that’s what, so grab yer axe down off the shelf and come join us, we’ll do a thing, make a thing happen.
March 13
Hey! Here you are sliding gently down the Pareto curve into Monday after a weekend of thrills n spills in the hitherto undiscovered football/free speech nexus .. if your frenzied efforts to promote/suppress Social Justice via sporting commentary have left you all hollow and sad eyed, then JAZZ NIGHT AT THE BEE’S MOUTH is the destination to fix what ails and aid your travails thanks to the Oscar-worthy efforts of Luke “Back In Action” Rattenbury (gtr) and Loz “Everything Everywhere All At Once”
Thomas (drms) as they lay out another yellow brick road of hot licks and cool grooves for you to clamber up the camber and set your eager footsteps towards the Emerald City hand in hand like the Start-Rite kids towards the future we all might manage to snatch from the jaws of possibility.. conjunctions wheel and pull apart in the sky, meanwhile down here on the terrestrial plane haters may hate, skaters may skate, flerfers debate, debt-ridden students procrastinate, payment rates inflate, the whole shabby circus swirl around and around and around and what are you to make of it? What will it make of you? Leave the pure cringe of John Redwood pretending he watches MOTD behind in the dustbin of history, grab yer axe off the shelf, come and join us, see what’s up… good times, that’s what.